ARMY OF THE POTOMAC ENEMY #12: "THE YOUNG'UNS"
Do not be deceived, preservers of the Union! What looks like an innocent group of rural boys is really the feared Confederate "Young'uns" death squad, renowned throughout the South for their covert intelligence work, military skill and bloodthirstiness.
Led by young Major Billy Batson, C.S.A. - shown at center in a defiant
pose - the Young'uns pose as pro-Union village boys who hang around the camps
of occupying Union armies. Engaging the troops in harmless games of marbles,
hide and seek and fishing, the various Young'uns ply valuable military information
regarding troop strength, disposition and routes of march from loose-lipped
Federal soldiers (who in many cases are not much older than a Young'un). This
information is collected and correlated and sent on to the Richmond Confederate
Command and Communications Center (C4) for analysis. C4 operatives then send
back execution orders to the Young'uns when they think the time is right.
Having received their orders the Young'uns then organize one last massive, seemingly innocent hide and seek game with Federal troops, and volunteer to be "it." Having the troops dispersed throughout a village or hamlet, the Young'uns - being highly skilled assassins - individually set upon their hapless victims with their lath swords and wooden firearms. So unexpected is the sudden vicious assault by the Young'uns that the troops have little or no time to defend themselves, and fall prey to these murderous little devils. The corpses are then collected and secretly buried by Rebel sympathizers in the village. Anticipating discovery, the Young'uns then disperse to the next rendezvous point selected by C4 (another Federally-occupied village) and begin the whole dastardly process again. At the next morning roll call many Federal troops are absent, and army intelligence accounts for them as merely "missing" or "deserted." One wonders how many poor Union troops have been dispatched in this sinister manner by Young'uns!
Army of the Potomac Central Intelligence hereby warns all personnel against seemingly innocent boys tagging along in the wake of the liberating Federal armies, and encourages a hasty "No!" to offers of a harmless game of marbles or hide and seek!
