DAVE's RUGBY AND LEAGUE PHRASE GUIDE

VERSION 4.6

December 4, 1995

From rec.sport.rugby.union Sun Dec 10 17:49:35 1995
From: djw1@cs.waikato.ac.nz (D J Warner)

Have you ever noticed how everyday words are given entirely different 
meanings when used in a rugby/league context? Also there are many phrases 
that certain idiotic commentators use which really get on my and probably 
your nerves. Well, this guide takes a look at some of these. I hope you 
have as much fun and enjoyment reading this list as the I had making it. 
Please do not take the material too seriously as it is meant to be humorous 
and not offensive.  This list has now really become the (nearly) complete A 
to Z of classic rugby and leagueisms. However, I am sure there will be many 
new stupid/annoying phrases that really piss you off!!  So if you think 
anything has been missed out or that the definitions are inaccurate please 
email me what you think. I am also are interested in any feedback you may 
have.

Cheers,
	-Dave.

Please email me at :   djw1@cs.waikato.ac.nz  

A great deal of thanks should go to my friend Reuben Lawson, who helped
me immensely in the beginning and you can reach him at:
	wnet5058@waikato.ac.nz 
Thanks Reuben!

Additional Contributions:
Many thanks to the following people who have sent in new entries to the 
list.  If you would like your name to appear here just simply email me with 
your new terms and don't forget to include your name and where in the world 
you live!!!
	Bill Taylor    (New Zealand)
	Brett Step  	  (South Africa)
	Brian Lee Chapman    (North Carolina, USA)
	Chris Walwyn  	  (South Africa)
	Dan Hattrup  	  (Colorado, USA)
	Neil Pennington       (Australia)
	Paul Waite     (New Zealand)
	Peter Cain             (Canada)
	Ross Mather               (Scotland)
	Terry New  		  (Ohio, USA)

Note: I am no longer crediting each entry separately.

Have fun, 
	David Warner 
(you probably think that I am  crazy and you are probably correct)

----- BEGIN LIST -----

2 - MAN LINEOUT
	Also known as a short lineout.  This is self-expanatory. 
	Eg: "Western Samoa are getting cleaned out at lineout time so they 
	have had to resort to the 2 - man lineout."
	( see cleaned out, lineout )

50 - 50 BALL
	Any ball that can be contested by either side is said to be 50 - 50,
	especially in the case of bombs, or in some lineouts.
	Eg: Warren Jack "its all in the reflexes" Burton should resort to the 
	bomb more in order to create some 50 - 50 ball.
	( see bomb )

ADVANTAGE LINE
        An imaginary line that extends across the field from where the last
        scrum, ruck, maul, lineout or play the ball was formed. This is used
        as a measure of how much good has been done.
        Eg: "The Otago backs are in disarray as they failed to make the 
        advantage line again."
        ( see play the ball, scrum, done good )

AGAINST THE FEED
	Only used in league commentaries to describe the extremely rare 
	occurrence of the team losing the ball to the opposition after 
	feeding it into the scrum. Should never never never ever happen,
	but has been known to occur. 
	Eg: "Oh dear... Alfie put the ball in properly that time, and 
	now the opposition have taken the ball against the feed. That'll 
	teach him."
	( see scrum, tighthead )

AGAINST THE HEAD
	Used only in Union commentaries to describe the rare occurance of the 
	ball being hooked by the opposition after the scrummage put in.
	Eg: "Gee, a little bit of illegal play there and Purvey's taken the 
	ball against the head for Waikato. Must've been the Hand of God."
	( see scrum, tighthead, against the feed )

AROUND THE CORNER
	A style of kicking that is the most suitable technique for todays
	conditions.
	How to kick around the corner style:
		1) Line the ball up with the goalposts.
		2) Take 2-3 steps backwards, followed by up to 2 steps to
		   either left or right, depending on whether you are right-
		   or left-footed (respectively).
		3) Calm down, either by following one of the following three 
		   techniques, or by your own method. 
		   (i) Lynagh technique: Sniff left armpit followed by right.
		       The smell should be sufficient to act as a relaxant.
		  (ii) Fox technique: Take deep breaths with arms at sides 
		       whilst shaking your fingers. Reputed to be better than
		       the Lynagh technique, because of Fox's higher accuracy.
		 (iii) Shane Howarth technique: Take 3 steps back followed
                       by 2 huge steps to the left (not 3 little ones) to
                       gently stretch the groin. Take a deep breath and as
                       you do so stroke your balls delicately. Remind
                       yourself that these might not be there for the next
                       match if you miss. Repeat.        	
                4) When calm, move in gently towards the ball and strike it 
                   with your boot making allowances for the wind.
                5) If you have done everything correctly you should have a 
                   more than even chance of the ball going over.
	Eg: These days everyone who is sane uses around the corner style.

ATTACKING RUGBY
	An expression used to describe the brand of rugby that a team plays. 
        It usually involves keeping the ball alive for as long as possible 
        and using the whole team in phase after phase of play. The theory 
        says that if you keep the ball alive long enough holes will appear 
        in the opposition defence.
	NOTE: not to be confused with the style of rugby Richard Loe prefers.
	Eg: Otago is said to play a brand of attacking rugby.

BACK ROW MOVE
	The back row are the loose forwards of a team. A back row move 
        consists of the loosies working in tandem from a scrum. One of them 
        picks the ball up (usually the number 8) and backs into one flanker 
        and tries to unload to the other flanker. However this always seems 
        to result in the referee pinging them for accidental offside so I 
        can't understand why teams do this.
	Eg: The back row move tried then was really stupid as it wasted 
        quality ball.
	( see pinging, quality ball )

BASICS
	(Or Fundamentals) Another (Stu) Wilsonism, it is always used when
	whining about a team which, for reasons best left to themselves, has
	decided to play Catch-up Footie right from the start of the game, 
	with miss-out passes, reverse passes and miracle balls being 
	attempted at each and every opportunity.
	Eg: "Now its just a matter of getting back to basics. These guys
	should be doing the fundamentals." (Stu makes a point of saying
	this at least once per game, even when it's not really appropriate).
	( see catch-up footie, miss-out pass, reverse pass, miracle ball )

BLACK DOT
	The black dot is the little marking on the centre of the cross bar. It
	is quite often not even black. Mal Meninga when lining up a shot for 
	goal used to say "Black Dot" to himself in order to imagine the ball 
	travelling straight down the middle. Because of this it is customary 
        to shout "Black Dot" at an opposition goal kicker as they are shooting 
        for goal in order to put them off by conjuring up images of a Meninga 
        in their minds.
	Eg: BLACK DOT (deep breath) BLACK DOT (deep breath) ......
	( see meninga, torpedo ) 

BLIND SIDE
	From scrums, rucks and mauls the shortest side to the touch line is
	known as the blind side. Most teams always seem to "work the blind"
	everytime they try an attacking move.
	NOTE: This term has also been used to describe teams that Richard
        Loe had played against (now fallen into disuse).
	Eg: The AB's are too predictable because they always work the 
	blindside with their big wingers.

BLINDER 
	Used by commentators when a League player has drunk some bad 
	homebrew... er, I mean when a player is having a good match.
        Eg: "OH! Renouf! He's having a blinder!"
	( see done plenty of good )

BOMB
	(i) A high kick into the air designed to usually put pressure on the
	opposition fullback. This pressure comes from the chasers who try to
        regather the ball or at least take out the fullback. In rugby the 
        ideal bomb should land just outside the 22m line to prevent the 
	"mark" being taken. In league it should land just outside the goal 
	line.
	NOTE: DO NOT use this term whilst playing rugby in Ireland, it
        can lead to possible misunderstandings. Instead use the local
        term "garryowen".
	Eg: "And that's a HUGE mid field bomb from Warren Johnson"
	(ii) The act of spoiling a certain try by doing something ridiculous.
	Eg: He bombed a certain try by cutting back inside. 
	(see cut back, high hoist, mark, take out)

BREAKDOWN
	(i) Where play momentarily halts, ie at a collapsed maul or a ruck.
	Eg: "The Waikato loosies are slow getting to that breakdown, John."
	(ii) Also used to describe what happens to the All Black loose
	forwards during a test match, they get injured so frequently.
	Mike Brewer has given new meaning to being first to the breakdown.
	Eg: "Whattaya mean, Brewers injured?! Has he broken down already!?"

BRILLIANT
	(i) An adverb (I done 6 form England) used to describe a passage of
	play that is particularly outstanding.
	Eg: That run by Lomu was absolutely BRILLIANT!!!!
	(ii) See Talented.
	Eg: That Campese is bloody brilliant!!!

BULLOCKING
	Pronounced 'bollocking' by most commentators and with usually the
	same effect, a bullocking run is usually made by a forward with 
	the ball in hand, scattering tacklers as he goes.
	Eg: "'Bull' Allen is making a bullocking run towards half-way - 
	the tacklers are trying to put him down, but there aren't enough 
	of them."

BUMFACE
	Will Carling (Ed.: Thanks Ross, I always wondered who they were 
	going on about.)

BUST
	When a player is able to break a tackle and find themselves in open 
	territory he is said to have made a bust. The bust may mean only 
	the breaking of the tackle or as much as a complete break up the 
	middle.
	NOTE FOR COMMENTATORS: Be careful when using this term during
        commentary on women's rugby matches.
	Eg: He made a great bust up the middle by splitting the defence 
	wide open.

CAMPO'S
	(Disease) Causes the player afflicted to do crazy thing in their 
	own in-goal such as trying to run it out when there are five
	players bearing down on you or trying to offload a miracle ball
	when no-one is in any position to catch the thing. Named after
	the Daring David Campese, largely through the '89 Wallabies - 
	Lions test series in-goal cough, resulting in the winning of the
	series for the Lions.
	Eg: "Strawbridge has got the ball within his own in-goal, he only
	needs to kick for touch - aw for fuck's sake, he's knocked the
	thing on and they've bloody well scored. He must have a case of
	the Campo's."
	( see cough, miracle ball )

CATCH-UP FOOTIE
	When one team is behind by a large amount of points they usually get 
	desperate and resort to a different game plan. This really only 
	happens in the last 20 minutes of a game. This tactic is known as 
	catch-up footie and is characterised by spinning the ball wide at 
	every chance (ie no continuous cut backs) , taking the tap on 
	penalties (instead of shooting for goal) and trying to unload 
	miracle balls all the time. This brand of rugby/league is highly 
	dangerous as it usually leads to coughs, intercepts and the loss of 
	2 or 3 easy points at each penalty. Therefore it is only recommended
	in hopeless situations.
	Eg: "They're down by 20 with only 15 to go on the clock, I think it's
	time to play catch-up footie."
	( see cough, intercept, miracle ball )

CAUGHT NAPPING
	Refers to the defense being unaware of what is happening and thus
	unable to defend properly.
	Eg: "The South African side was caught napping from that quick
	tap by Bachop."

CHANGE STRIP 
	Is the outfits that a home team changes into when some other team 
	comes visiting and have the same colours as the home team normally 
	play in.
	Eg: "The Canadian's have used their change strip today as their 
	uniform is exactly the same colour as at least three other playing 
	nations!!!"
	( see strip(ii) )

CHANGING THE ANGLES
	When a player comes into the backline at a different line to the rest 
	of the backline he is said to be changing the angles. This has the 
	effect of disrupting the opposition defensive patterns in the hope of
	making a bust. However this can result in the player coughing up
	the ball. Used most effectively against sliding defences.
	Eg: "Little is changing the angles again"
	( see cough, bust, sliding defence )

CHEAP YARDS
	When the ball carrier makes ground up the field because of ineffective
	or non-existent tackling then they are said to have made cheap yards.
	Eg: "The marker defence is not working as they are making cheap yards
	every time."
	( see hard yards/metres )

CHEATING
        When a player knowingly infringes he is said to be cheating. If the 
        ref spots it a penalty will be conceded, but if you get away with 
	it, it's a good tactic. And remember this "It ain't cheating if you 
	don't get caught".
        Eg: "Carter has been cheating all game, but is doesn't matter 
	because the ref hasn't spotted a thing."
        ( see conceding the penalty )

CHIP
	The same as a pop kick and is normally performed by a centre. 
	Eg: "Great little chip there from Jason Little, he found space and
	over he went."
	( see pop kick )

CLEAN
        A player who never resorts to cheating or dirty play is known as a 
        clean player. The complete opposite of filthy.
        Eg: The Great Grant Fox was a clean player.
        ( see filthy )

CLEANED OUT
        A term used to describe a team that is not winning any ball in the
        lineouts and are therefore forced to feed of the crumbs.
        Eg: "Otago is getting cleaned out at lineout time and they are 
	forced to use Joseph at the back everytime."
        ( see crumbs )

COAT OF PAINT
	A term used mainly in league when a shot for goal misses the posts 
	by less than half a metre when using "around the corner" style or 
	getting within the width of another set of posts when using 
	"torpedo style".
	Eg: OOOOHHH.. there was only a coat of paint in that one.
	( see torpedo, around the corner )

COLLAPSING THE SCRUM
        When a scrum goes to ground (ie the front rows hit the deck) it is 
        said to have collapsed. The reasons for this happening are many and 
        varied, not even the referee knows why. Because of this the referee 
        will tend to ping a player at random in order to continue the game
        if he has had enough of resetting the scrum after each collapse. 
	This is considered to be good refereeing, but most teams find 
	themselves hard done by the decision. If a team has in the eyes of 
	the referee deliberately collapsed a scrum in order to prevent a 
	push-over, a penalty try may be awarded.
	Eg: "I think Otago deliberately collapsed that scrum in order to 
	stop a certain try."
        ( see pinging, push-over, scrum )

COMING DOWN WITH SNOW ON IT
	Used in Northern Hemisphere to describe and Up and Under that has 
	gone to an unusually high height.
	Eg: "Crumbs, that one's coming down with snow on it."
	( see bomb, crumbs, up and under )

CONCEDING THE PENALTY
        A good professional team will deliberately concede a penalty in order
        to prevent a try being scored. Other teams with really stupid hot
        headed players will concede penalties just for the fun of it. A 
        penalty can be purposely conceded by some of the following methods:
            1) Doing a superman impression by diving in over the top in a ruck.
            2) Being blatantly offside at ruck, maul and scrum time.
            3) Collapsing the scrum.
            4) Punching or kicking someone right in front of the referee.
               This tends to be especially annoying if your team has just 
		been awarded a penalty and the referee reverses it.
            5) Not releasing the ball in a tackle situation.
            6) Not allowing the tackled player to release the ball by lying
               all over them.
	    7) Stripping the ball in the tackle in front of the referee.
	    8) Bad mouthing the ref in a way that really pisses him off!
        All good teams these days have specialists at giving away silly 
        penalties and they are usually found in the front row of a team.
        Eg: "That was a really stupid penalty conceded by Jamie Joseph, 
	there was no need to stand on Carter's head and now Bishop has 
	reversed the penalty."
        ( see over the top, collapsing the scrum, offside, strip )

COUGH
	The act of losing the ball forward for no apparent reason.
	Eg: "He's coughed the ball up right on the line... *again*"

CRUMBS
	(i) A term used to describe not good quality ball that a team 
	"feeds" off, such as loose ball at line out time.
	Eg: "Those Counties forwards have been starved of possession so 
	they have been forced to feed off the crumbs."
	(ii) A term used by commentators to indicate awe.
	Eg: "Crumbs, Keith, there're some big tackles going in there"
	( see quality ball )

CUT BACK
	The act of bringing the ball closer to the forwards after the ball 
	has been released from the ruck, instead of passing it out to the 
	wing. This is achieved by picking out the closest opposition 
	forwards and charging straight towards them. As a result, many 
	tries are bombed, because passing it to the wings scores tries.
	Eg: "He's cut back inside into the opposition forwards"
	( see bomb (ii) )

DECK
	(i) Another term for the ground or playing surface.
	Eg: A good tackle is one which puts a player on the deck.
	(ii) Can also be used as a verb in order to describe somebody 
	thumping an opponent to the ground.
	Eg: "Robin Brooke just decked Eric Rush!"

DONE GOOD
	Where a player has performed some good deed - placed a ball well in 
	the tackle, has made a good tackle, a good kick upfield, or has made 
	hard yards/metres.
        Eg: "He done good"
	( see hard yards/metres )

DONE PLENTY OF GOOD
	As above, but the action results in points being scored. Includes
	making a critical pass, kick, or intercept. Also can be used when 
	a player has "done good" throughout an entire game.
	Eg: "He done plenty of good with that (insert pass/kick/catch)"
	( see done good )

DOT IT DOWN
	When a player has forced the ball over the opposition's goal-line, 
	he is said to have "dotted it down". Several styles are available 
	to the player of today:
		1) The Wilson "hold it in front while you dive for the line"
		style. Risky and especially stupid, as a tackle in mid-flight
		is usually sufficient to dislodge the ball and cost you the
		match (many expletives about the 1994 Bledisloe Cup match 
		deleted).
		2) The Halligan stretch: diving and reaching for the line at 
		full stretch while the touchline is a matter of centimetres 
		away. Better than manoeuvre (1) as the ball is grasped firmly
		by the hands.
		3) Crash-over: Usually from a ruck or maul close to the line.
		Involves one of the larger forwards breaking away, busting
		weak tackles and falling over the line to score. Very hard 
		to stop.
		4) Push-Over: see Push-over
		5) Show-off style: Where the backs have split the defence and
		run in to score the try with little, if any, opposition. Can
		result in an unfortunate, not to mention embarrassing, cough.
		6) Copy-book style: Rarely done, so not worth mentioning.
	Eg: "And he's dotted it down in the corner/under the sticks for a 
	ssSENSATIONall try!!!"
	( see wilson, cough, push-over )

DOUBLE AROUND
	A rather useless and stupid backline move where a player passes the 
	ball to the player outside of him and then runs around behind the
	receiver and gets on his outside. This has the effect of creating
	an overlap where one doesn't exist. However this rarely works as 
	no else knows what is going on apart from the original passer and
	usually results in a cough or an intercept.
	Eg: "I don't know what Walter Little is playing at, but the Double 
	Around is simply not his style."
	( see cough, intercept, overlap )

DROPPIE
	(i) Another term for drop/field goal.
	Eg: Langer sure needs some practice at those droppies.
	(ii) Drop-restart, either from the 22 or half-way in RU, or in the
	goal-mouth in RL. 
	Eg: "Howarths droppie from half-way failed to go the ten metres"

EASY METRES
	( see cheap yards ).

EIGHTMAN
	Obscure South African term for the Number 8 forward.
	Eg: "Tim Gavin the eightman for Australia has crashed over for
	an exciting push-over try."
	( see push-over )

ENGINE ROOM
        Another name for the two locks of a team, especially in reference to 
        scrums.
        Eg: "In the engine room today for the All Black's we have Cooksley 
	and Jones."

EVER-PRESENT
	Refers to a player, usually the open side flanker, who is always "on"
	the ball carrier. This can only be achieved through being constantly
	offside all game.
	Eg: "The ever-present John Jeffery was always a real pain for any 
	opposition half back or 1st five eigths."
	( see offside )

FAIRIES
	Forwards name for the backs; somewhat archaic; not used in commentary
	because of its alternative connotations.
	Eg: We (the fatties) do all the hard work, they (the fairies) get
	all the tries. (Pre-70's forward's complaint about the game)

FAKE SPEED 
	Is actually what the open side flanker who "WAS ALL OVER THE PITCH" 
	had-- the bastard was offside all match long... Who needs speed when 
	you can notice when the ref's looking or not.
	Eg: "Brewer has disguised his fake speed well by being constantly
	offside all game."
	( see genuine speed, ever-present )

FATTIES
	Backs name for the forwards; somewhat archaic; still used by Stu "the 	
	wanker" Wilson.
	Eg: The fatties make hard yards and bust tackles.
 
FILTHY
        A player who continuously infringes, throws punches, stomps and pokes
        opposition full backs in the eye is called filthy.
        Eg: Richard "Pokai" Loe is the filthiest player in NZ at the moment,
        but Joseph comes a close second.
        ( see stomping, pokai )

FLAT
        When the defending backline are close to the off side line they are 
        said to be standing up flat. There tends to be a very fine line 
        between being flat and offside and many referees will tend to ping
        sides whenever they feel like it.
        Eg: "Those cheating XXXXXX backs have been standing up flat all game."
        ( see cheating, ping, offside )

FLAT-FOOTED
	A player who is stationary when the opposition is moving towards
	him at a rapid rate is said to be flat footed.
	Eg: "Walter Little was unable to keep up as he was caught 
	flat-footed from the start."

FOURTEEN-POINTER
        An intercept made when a try was almost certain, leading to a runaway 
        try scored at the other end. 
        (For some reason known as a twelve-pointer in league.) 
        Eg: "That fourteen pointer under the sticks has completely screwed 
        them."
        ( see intercept )

FRENCH FLAIR
	Used to describe any legal attack with ball in hand within your own 
	half. 
	Eg: "England need to show some French Flair to stand any chance in 
	this match."
	( see attacking rugby )

FRINGE
        (i) A player who is close to being selected for their national team 
	is known as a fringe player.
        Eg: "Bull" Allen is a fringe player for the AB's.
        (ii) A player who is close to being deemed off side is known to play
        on the fringes. This normally applies at ruck and maul times. A good 
        open side flanker will play on the fringes all game.
        Eg: "Richard Loe has been on the fringes all game".
	(iii) A player who likes to play the game dressed in fishnet 
        stockings, a red suspender belt, and a nightie with lots of black 
        lacy bits.
	Eg: "Christ Keith, I think the new **** ****** uniforms are a bit on
	the fringe."

FULL CREDIT
	A phrase used by players during post match TV interviews.  It has
	been used so many times that it has lost all meaning completely.
	You can blame Fitzy for this one.
	Eg: "Full credit to the guys/boys/oppostion, they played their
	guts out for the full 80 minutes."

GAME OF TWO HALVES
	Another post match cliche.  Loosely translated to mean "We were
	leading by shit loads at the break and then we fucked up big time
	and lost rather stupidly."
	Eg: "To use an old cliche it was a game of two halves."

GAS
	(i) Another term for pace or speed.
	Eg: He has got plenty of gas.
	(ii) Also used to describe a malodorous complaint associated with
        the tight-five when straining particularly hard in the scrum.
	Eg: "Gee there is a lot of gas in that scrum;  Yeah, and the tight 
	five are working hard in there too."

GENIUS
	Any player who does NOT cut back inside.
	Eg: "CAMPESE!!! is an absolute genius!!!." (Said during a Bledisloe
	Cup test after he went around Timu to score out wide.)
	( see cut back )

GENUINE SPEED
	Invented by Stu "the wanker" Wilson, commentator extraordinaire. A
	player who can run extremely quickly has "genuine speed". Although
	it is implied by the use of the term "genuine", no-one has ever been 
	accused of having fake speed.
	Eg: "That Osborne... he's got genuine speed, he has" (heard 3-4 times
	in the 1994 NHarbour/Canterbury semi).

GIRLS
	Another name used by forwards to describe the backs. 
	( see fairies )

GO LOOKING FOR WORK
        When a good winger is starved of the ball he will go infield and play
        out of position in order to get involved in the game. This may happen
        as a result of continuous cut backs by the inside centres or because 
        of a kicking 1st 5/8ths.
        Eg: "Kirwan has come off his wing to go looking for work because he 
        hasn't seen the ball all game."
        ( see cut back, inside centre, kicking 1st 5/8ths, out of position )

GO THE DISTANCE
	(i) When a penalty has been awarded or a try scored, and the kicker 
	has come forward to attempt the shot at goal. If, upon taking the 
	kick, it fails to reach the cross-bar (as opposed to spraying to 
	either side), it can be said to have not gone the distance.
	Eg: "Ohhh... I'm afraid that isn't going to go the distance"
	(ii) Also refers to players and their ability to last the full 80 
	minutes, in the same way as petrol is used.
	Eg: "I don't think the O**** forwards are going to go the distance"
	( see spray, petrol)

GO YOU GOOD THING!!!
	A little gem from that loud mouthed Ocker TV commentator Chris
	"I'm not very" Handy.  It is used during the replay of a great 
	individual try being scored by an Australian.
	Eg: (As Jason Little scythes through the ineffective tackling to 
	dot it down under the sticks)  "Goow yew goud theeng!!!"

GOT ALL THE SKILLS
	Said by admiring commentators in reference to players who can kick, 
	run, pass *and* tackle well, and possess foresight.
	Eg: "Zinnies' come back to cover that kick really well, and his kick
	has found touch two metres out from the opposition goal-line... awww,
	he's got all the skills, he has."

GOT THE WOOD ON
        A term used at scrum time to describe a team who has the ability to
        push the opposition pack backwards.
        Eg: "Waikato has got the wood on the Otago scrum."

GRUBBER
	A small kick that travels mainly along the ground.
	Eg: "Alfie has put in another little grubber to totally surprise the 
	opposition and score under the posts; he's never done that before!"

HARD YARDS/METRES
	The act of breaking the advantage line, usually involved through use
	of good body position (head forward). No passing is involved apart 
	from the feeding of the ball to the player, who then sticks his head 
	down and charges forward. Can quite often result in a cough.
        Eg: "The fatties up front are making plenty of hard yards every time 
	they receive the ball."
	( see advantage line, cough, fatties )

HE ONLY KNOWS ONE WAY
	Refers to player who lacks foresight, or lacks the ability to pass 
	the ball. Players who only know one way simply go forward all game 
	all day, into or through as many opposition players as possible.
        Eg: "Hainsworth's got the ball... he only knows one way"

HEADLESS CHOOK
        A player suffering from Little's disease. Said to be similar to
        the unfortunate bird thus named. (Probably an insult to the bird.)
        Eg: In the 1991 World Cup Wallaby/AB semi final the entire AB 
	backline were headless chooks.
        ( see cut back,  little's disease )

HERE'S A CHANCE
	Used primarily in RL but found creeping into RU commentary. Used 
	when in attacking backplay and the players equal or outnumber the 
	defence. Pronunciation is very important: here is pronounced as 
	though it has two e's after the h, but still said really quickly. 
	Chance is pronounced as "channz". 
	Eg: "Eet's sex on foive Toddy, heerz a channz".

HIGH HOIST
	Like a hoist, except much much higher and it returns with a
	whitish colouring.
	Eg: "The high hoist from Rob Andrew has caught everyone by 
	surprise."
	( see coming down with snow on it )

HIGH SHOT
        A tackle that comes into contact above the shoulders of the victim 
	is known as a high shot. This can be a very effective method of 
	taking a player out, but usually results in a pinging. A high shot 
	can cause some niggle in a game. Also known as a head high tackle.
        Eg: "Oh shit, that high shot nearly took his head clean off as he 
        hasn't moved for 5 minutes."
        ( see take out, pinging, niggle )

HIGH-STEP
	Campese's way of running when someone tries to tackle him. Normally
	the defender lands up in hospital with a stitches.
	Eg: "Great high-step there from Campo; the opposing winger hasn't 
	moved yet!"

HIT IT UP
        A rugby league term meaning, when short of intelligent ideas (i.e. 
        most of the game) to charge forward in the hope of causing a bust.
        Eg: "Lomax has been hitting it up strong all game."
        ( see bust )

HOIST
	( see bomb )

HOOF
	Kicking downfield for tactical position. Named after the noise the 
	ball makes as it leaves Rob Andrew's foot.
	Eg: "And Bachop has *hoofed* that ball downfield. Pity it went out
	on the full, though."

HOSPITAL PASS
        A stupid pass, by a player that lacks foresight, that puts the 
        receiver in immediate danger of being tackled is known as a hospital
        pass. The receiver usually gets some treatment upon being put on the
        deck.
	Note: Ziekenhuis Pass == Hospital Pass in dutch. It's about the only 
	one of the phrases used in Holland that actually get's translated into
	Dutch.
	Eg: "That pass was a real hospital pass from Crabb as Foster got the
 	ball and Carter at the same time."
        ( see deck, treatment )

HOW'S YOUR FATHER  
	A term used whenever a player loses his temper and shows it.  It is 
	mostly used when a player pushes an opponent or tries to deck him.  
	Eg: "After that stomping on Pienaar there was a bit of How's your 
	father amongst the forwards."
	( see deck (ii) )

I DON'T BELIEVE IT
	An expression used by moronic commentators to describe a passage of
	play that is unexpected or out of the ordinary. Which really means
	every time a try is scored or stuffed up.
	Eg: "I don't beeeeelieve it,.... they've scored again".

INCISIVE CUT
        An incisive cut is a backline movement that results in a bust when 
	a player changes the angles, usually when coming in from the 
	fullback position.
        Eg: "Hewson made an incisive cut from fullback."
        ( see bust, changing the angles )

INDUSTRIAL RUGBY
	Rugby as it's played in much of the United States at Bside, 
	collegiate & high school levels.  Characterized by more fistfights 
	than scrummages, a complete lack of knowledge of the laws and a 
	unwillingness to give up poor habits (ie lack of fitness, head 
	tackling & 'spearing' with your head  (ah! qv spearing)) acquired in 
	American Gridiron/Football.  
    	Eg "That industrial match bore more resemblance to the recent Tyson 
	fight than to a game of rugby."
	( see spearing )

INSIDE CENTRE
        A team has two inside centres, the 2nd 5/8ths and the centre. The 
        inside centres are the greatest sufferers of Little's Disease.
        Eg: "The inside centres are doing their job well; they are cutting
        back inside every time they receive the ball."
        ( see little's disease, cut back )

INTERCEPT
	When a player fires a pass that is taken by an opposition player it
	is said to be intercepted. This can quite often result in the scoring
	of a try known as an "intercept try".
	Eg: "He shouldn't have unloaded then as the intercept has cost them 
        the game".

KICKING 1st 5/8ths
        A 1st 5/8ths who constantly kicks the ball when they receive it is
        known as a kicking 1st 5/8ths. This is an important component of
        ten man rugby. However this is especially frustrating for the backs 
        outside him as they never see the ball on attack.
        Eg: Some people (mainly from the South Island) despised the Great 
        Grant Fox as they thought he was kicking 1st 5/8ths all of the time.

KNOCK-ON
	RL: When a player drops the ball, irrespective of whether it 
	travels forwards or backwards, he will have been seen to have 
	knocked it on by the eagle-eyed referee (Greg McCallum).
	Eg: "That was *another* poor call by McCallum, there was no way
	that's a knock-on".
	RU: When a player coughs the ball forward; however, half-backs
	at the base of scrums and rucks are usually exempt from this
	rule, usually because the ref is paying more attention to the poor
	bastard getting treatment than the clearance of the ball.
	Eg: "Crabb's knocked the ball on in that scrum, but its okay, 
	cos' Colin "Eyes Of The" Hawke has missed it. Again."
	( see cough, treatment )

LATE TACKLE
        (i) A term used to describe a tackle on a player well after he
        has got rid of the ball. The degree of 'lateness' varies in each 
	rugby-playing country. In England, if the tackle is made 10 
	picoseconds or longer after the player has got rid of the ball, 
	the tackle is late. In New Zealand, if the tackle is made during 
	the same 40 minute period, it's Ok.
	Eg: "Crowley got the kick away to touch, but the Brooke brothers
	combined to thump him with a huge late tackle."
	(ii) A term used to describe a tackle made in a game played
        under lights with a kickoff time later than 7.25pm.
	Eg: "Well Stuey, I guess that's what you would call a really late
	tackle - it's quarter to nine in the evening!"

LEADING FROM THE FRONT
	Refers to the team's captain, if he/she is a forward. Involves making
	Hard Yards/Metres, doing good, putting players on the deck 
	(preferably by tackling), and making plenty of busts.
	Eg: An inspirational leader, like Zinzan Brooke, is said to lead from
        the front.
	( see hard yards/metres, done good, deck, bust )

LEFT OR RIGHT
	When the scrum is packing down in centrefield and the ball is 
	released, it could go either way; hence, left or right. Which is so 
	bloody obvious (which other way could they go?) I wish Quinny would 
	stop saying it.
	Eg: "They could go left or right from the scrum, Stuey"
	( see scrum )

LEG SPEED
        Another term for genuine speed which that NZ league commentator 
        (Lambert (sp?)) used to harp on about. A problem can arise when this
	'leg speed' does not equal the speed of the upper body of course.
        Eg: "He's got real leg speed."
        ( see genuine speed )

LIFTING
        A lineout technique perfected by the Australians, and poorly imitated
        by South Africa, whereby at a throw-in, a player is held in the air
        (or "supported") by his team mates for anything up to three seconds.
        Eg: "McCall was up in air for ages; no he wasn't lifted, he's just
        a natural jumper."
        ( see lineout )

LINE BALL
	(i) A term that is used by commentators when a pass is only thrown 
	forward by 1 to 2 m.
	Eg: "That's a harsh call by McCallum. That was definitely line ball" 
	(ii) How a referee sees a pass or line out throw in when he is 30m 
        from the action and the ball travels at least 2m forward.
	Eg: "Keep on playing fellas. That was close enough to a line ball"

LINEOUT
        When the ball is put out over the touch line a lineout forms. This
        involves the two opposing forward packs to line up parallel next to
        one another. They should be standing about 1m apart. The hooker of 
	the team who didn't put the ball out (unless it went out from a 
	penalty) gets to throw it in to the lineout. Before the ball is even 
	released the gap in the lineout should be immediately closed up. Once 
	thrown in every player should have a go at getting the ball by leaping
	in the air, jumping across to the other side, jumping off the 
	shoulders of the opposition, lifting, using the outside arm or by any 
	other method which the referee does not ping for cheating. This 
	creates a real mess which makes it almost impossible to determine who 
	is cheating and who isn't, so the ref will at least 6 times a game 
	randomly ping a team for infringing.
        Eg: "That lineout was a real mess, the ref could of pinged either 
	team for at least a dozen different infringements; it was good 
	refereeing to simply play on."
        ( see take out, lifting, pinging )

LITTLE's DISEASE
	Known in the Latin as cutbackitis, it involves the 2nd 5/8ths
	perambulating in a rapid forward motion to a point between the
	advancing forwards and the goal-line every time he/she receives
	the ball. This disease is very contagious and has spread throughout 
        most of the rugby playing world. Named after the famous North Harbour 
        2nd 5/8ths W. Little.
	Eg: "He's cut back for the tenth time today - he must have Little's
	disease."
	( see cut back )

LUYT TACKLE
	A particularly refined form of post-match insult. Guaranteed to 
	win friends and influence people. NOT! Best used to poison the 
	minds at after match dinners and an especially effective way of 
	cleaning out the cupboard of every friend you ever thought you 
	might have once had.
	Eg: "Big call there from Louis, the Luyt tackle he put on has
	offended everyone present."

MANY   
        More than twenty.
        Eg: "Fox made a mistake with that kick, he doesn't make many of 
	those...!"

MARK
        In rugby a player that catches a kick, such as a bomb, in their own
        22m zone may claim the fair catch or mark. Play then restarts from
        where the mark was taken. This is a great relief to many fullbacks as 
        it saves them from a lot of treatment.
        Eg: "Howarth was lucky to receive the mark that time as he was about 
        to get nailed in a bone crushing tackle."
        ( see bomb(i), treatment )

MAUL
	Two main kinds: a rolling maul and a go-nowhere waste-of-time 
	give-the-ball-to-the-opposition type maul, which Waikato 
	specialises in.
	Eg: "Dear me, John, Waikato have lost the ball because they
	didn't use it. Why couldn't they have released it?"
	( see rolling maul )

MENINGA
	The act of missing an easy shot for goal, named after the great 
	league player Mal Meninga. He was/is the greatest exponent of torpedo 
	kicking in the modern game, who could almost manage a 50% success 
	rate. His sprays are some of the best misses ever. Can also be used 
	for stuffing something up completely. 
	Eg: "He really meninga'd that easy one. My five-year old could've 
	done better"
	( see torpedo, spray )

MEN TO BURN
        The situation where there are more men on the ball carrier's team
        outside of him than in the opposition team. Very similar to overlap.
        Eg: "Eroni Clarke has men to burn... now he's cut back inside".
        ( see cut back, overlap )

MILKING
        A player will quite often will pretend to be interfered with in the
        play the ball or a half back may throw a dummy pass in order to 
        receive a penalty from the ref, such a tactic is known as milking.
        Eg: "Benny Elias has done good, he's milked a penalty out of 
        McCallum by deliberately loosing the ball in the play the ball."
        ( see done good, play the ball )

MIRACLE BALL
	A pass that is deemed to be Miracle Ball is one which seems impossible
	and usually results in a cough, or an intercept. Success can often
	result in plenty good being done. Used mainly in RL commentaries.
	Eg: "He triod to offload a meerecle bawl there, but it deedn't com
	awf"
	( see cough, intercept, done plenty of good )

MISS OUT PASS
        In a regular backline movement a pass that goes wider out than the 
        next player is termed a miss out pass. More than one player can be
        missed out at a time. This form of passing is usually very disastrous
        as it leads to intercepts and the wastage of good overlaps. In my
        opinion it is completely over used.
        Eg: "Ricky Stuart did not need to throw the miss out pass then, he 
	had a 3 on 2 overlap outside him."
        ( see overlap, intercept )

MORTALITY RATE
	Refers to the number of injuries and replacements that occurs in
	a certain position.  A high rate is a cause of great concern for
	coaches and can lead to ridiculous selection policies.
	Eg: "In order to combat the high mortality rate in the All Black
	loose forwards Laurie Mains in his infinite wisdom has decided 
	to play Brewer, Jones and Brooke as they are three very reliable
	players who can always last the distance."
	( see breakdown (ii) )

NEEEH  NEEEH
	The sound made by the Auckland Mouse's trumpet. Initially intended
	to rouse the Auckland fans to fever pitch, it is now there for 
	tradition's sake.
	Eg: "NEEEH NEEEH HAR-BOUR  NEEEH NEEEH HAR-BOUR"

NIGGLE
        When tempers, especially amongst the forwards, start to get frayed 
        and little scuffles start to brake out, then there is said to be 
        some niggle creeping into the game.
        Eg: In the 1994 NPC final Mark Carter was a constant source of niggle
        and eventually he got the treatment he deserved.
        ( see treatment )

NORTHERN HEMISPHERE REFEREEING  
	Only vaguely similar to its cousin south of the equator, northern
	hemisphere refereeing involves stopping absolutely *anything*
	before it results in a try-scoring situation. But they can't even
	do that right.
	Eg: "It was a good display of northern hemisphere refereeing. The
	ref managed to stop seven tries, and awarded 43 penalties for 
	various petty technicalities."
	( see southern hemisphere refereeing )

OFFSIDE
        Being offside is a pingable offence. In rugby a player must be behind 
        the hind most feet of a ruck or maul in order to be onside, in league
        they must be back 10m from the play the ball. When the ref feels that
        it is time for a penalty he will dish out one for offside.
        Eg: "Harrigan has stamped his authority on the game by giving an
        early penalty for being offside."
        ( see play the ball )

OLD INSIDE BALL
	Why it is old I don't know. However it is a pass that fired in the
	opposite direction to the rest of the backline movement.
	Eg: "Ohhh.. inspired play there by Langer with the old inside ball."
	( see changing the angles, sliding defence )

ONSLAUGHT 
	A period of play where one team constantly attacks the opposition's
	goal line for several phases of play. Usually, an onslaught provides 
	few points as the necessary speed of play means that a cough is 
	likely and turnover inevitable, especially considering that only a 
	weak team could spend so long on the goal line without doing any 
	good.
	EG: "What an onslaught by the Canadians - how long can the 
	Springbok line hold?" (Long enough, as it turned out)
	( see cough, done good, turnover )

OOHHHHHH REF
	A general cry of anguish from players when they think they have been 
	hard done by. This usually happens in lineouts. It can also be used
        to point out to the ref an infringement by the opposition in order
        to help him see it like it is.
        Eg: "Oohhhhhh ref!!! Lifting."
        ( see lineout )

OUT OF POSITION
        In rugby and league, players are assigned positions of where they 
        should play; ie a winger should be on the end of a backline. When a 
        player is expected to be in their normal position on the field but
        are actually somewhere else they are said to be out of position.
        Being caught out of position in defence will usually lead to the 
        concession of tries.
        Eg: "What's Fitzpatrick doing out of position on the wing; he should 
        be in there amongst the forwards slugging it out."

OVER THE TOP
        When a ruck has formed and players from one team dive across off 
	their feet onto the other side in order to prevent the ball being 
	cleared they are said to be going over the top. This is a pingable 
	offence.
        Eg: "The Springbok forwards have dived over the top again and the
        referee is letting them get away with it."
        ( see pinging )

OVERLAP
        An overlap occurs when the attacking side has more men in the 
	backline than the defending side has. This can be caused by the 
	fullback coming into the backline or by defending players being 
	caught out of position. By simply passing it through each player 
	an easy try will be scored. However this is not usually the case as 
	many tries are bombed as the inside centres will quite often cut 
	back or fire a stupid miss out pass and thus nullify the overlap. 
	This results in irate wingers.
        Eg: "It's a 4 on 3 overlap, they must score surely; oohhhhhh noooo 
        he's cut back inside and bombed a certain try".
        (see inside centre, miss out pass, cut back,bomb(ii), out of position)

PETROL
	Another term for staying power/stamina. Usually used in reference to 
	teams who are exhausted in the final quarter.
	Eg: "Otago ran out of petrol on more than one occasion this year, 
	letting numerous teams win in the last 15-20 minutes"
	( see running on empty )

PHALLIC TERMS
	Mostly used in RL commentaries; the following were all heard during
	the live Sky coverage of the '94 Winfield Cup "Grannnn Final".
	 Brief Insertion: When a side has finally made it into the opposition
	half and is just as quickly pushed back out again through punishing
	tackles or through coughing the ball.
	 Early Insertion: When a player is substituted/interchanged early
	in a match. 
	 Splitting Them Wide Open: When the defending side's defence fails
	to hold back the opposing team (who will usually be playing at pace)
	they are said to have been 'split wide open'.
	 Thrust up the middle: see Hit It Up; differs in that at the end of 
	the "Thrust", the player is always put on the deck.
	Eg: "The Early Insertion of Darren Smith was a dumb move by the 
	Canterbury coach as the Doggies had just Thrust Up The Middle into the
	Raiders half when a brilliant tackle on Smith turned the attack into 
	a mere Brief Insertion and the resulting cough has given the Canberra
	backs a chance to Split the Bulldog defence Wide Open."
	( see playing it at pace, deck, cough )

PIGS
        See Fatties.

PINGING
	When a referee blows up the play for a penalty or free kick the
	infringing team is said to be pinged.
	Eg: "Bishop has been consistently pinging the Auckland forwards all
	game".

PLAY THE BALL
        In league when a tackle has been effected the ref with ask the 
	tackled player to stand up and play the ball. The player should 
	then be released and get to his feet properly. The ball should 
	then be placed on the ground and raked back by one boot to a player 
	behind him. However this usually not the case as the play is quite 
	often termed a "real mess". This is because the opposition usually 
	interferes or the tackled player will try to play it while still 
	held or perhaps he might sort of just throw the ball back between 
	his legs. Many players will try to have the ref on in order to milk 
	the penalty. What ever happens this is a constant source of pinging.
        Eg: "Pon-gee-ah doesn't know how to play the ball properly; he 
	hasn't got it right all game."
        ( see pinging, milking )

PLAYING IT AT PACE
	A team with poor quality forwards will often try to play the game at 
	pace; this involves taking quick taps, quick throw-ins, fast drop-outs
	but not necessarily spreading it at every opportunity. 
	Eg: "Southland will have to play their games at pace next year, as
	their forwards are too light to compete with the larger scrums"
	( see taking the tap )

POKAI
        Richard Loe's nickname after sticking his finger in the eye of Otago
        fullback Greg Cooper in the 1992 NPC final. It is now used for any
        instance of a player being poked in the eye.
        Eg: "Aaawwww... that's a real pokai if I ever saw one."    

POP KICK
        A little kick into the air designed only to get over the head of the 
        defending player directly in front of the kicker.
        Eg: "Strawbridge has used the pop kick to great effect this 
	afternoon. He has tried it everytime he has got the ball and it 
	even worked once."

PULLISLEGORFANITIMWITHEWETEND
	Another gentle comment often heard along the touchline, in the 
	nature of giving sound advice to a player whose team is being 
	supported. 
	Eg: "PULLISLEGORFANITIMWITHEWETEND!!!"

PUSH-OVER
	(i) Weak opposition is said to be a push-over if they offer little or
	no resistance.
	Eg: "The West Coast are push-overs at rugby."
	(ii) A try scored from a set scrum near to the line. The attacking 
        team attempts to drive the opposition over the goal-line, with the 
        number 8 picking up the ball and attempting to dot it down over the 
        line. Can quite often result in a cough in the attempt to get the ball
        down over the line. Very hard to stop if the opposition has a "got the 
        wood on" you. Also known as a John Mitchell special until 1994.
	Eg: "Waikato have got them pinned on their own line as this is the 
        sixth scrum in succession in order to get the push-over."
	( see dot it down, scrum, cough, got the wood on )

PUT 'EM OVER FROM ANYWHERE
	Used to describe a goal-kicker with prodigious skill. Restricted to 
	around the corner style *only*.
	Eg: "Halligan can put 'em over from anywhere"
	( see around the corner )

QUALITY BALL
	Ball fed tidily to the halfback from mauls, rucks, lineouts or scrums
	for delivery to the backs is quality ball. Only teams with good
	forwards are guaranteed of gaining quality ball. Teams without good
	forwards are forced to feed off the crumbs.
	NOTE: This term can also be used to describe the 'real' leather
        rugby balls played with around the World, as opposed to those
        silly plastic ones that the World Cup Sponsor (eg. Adidas)
        produces in order to make ace goalkickers look like arseholes.
	Eg: "Cooksley has won plenty of quality [two-handed] ball in the
	lineouts."
	( see crumbs )

QUICKY
        *NOT* what you might think - nothing to do with rugby groupies or
        cheer leaders!  A quick throw-in.  Usually taken when...
        (i)  there are no opposition players nearby when you have the ball
        (ii) there are, but they are cleaning you out horribly, because...
        (iii) the ref is not pinging them for lifting.
        Eg: "They have to resort to the quicky again in order to compete."
        ( see cleaned out, pinging, lifting )

RAKING
	Same as stomping.  
	Eg: "Pienaar came off the field with a long rake mark on his back."
	( see stomping )

REFEREE 
	The stupid jerk who tries to enforce the rules of the game. The 
	only job in the world where you have to start out perfect and get 
	better (sadly, few achieve this lofty goal).
	Eg: Greg where's my walking stick and spectacles McCallum was sadly
	rated the number one referee in the Winfield Cup.

REVERSE PASS
        A passing technique used by off-form halfbacks (scrum halves)
        to please the crowd and convince their coach that they really
        _are_ having a great game after all. Stu Forster, the Otago
        and All Black halfback now makes 60% of his passes this
        way. Has the added effect of keeping both the 2nd-Five and
        the Centre on their toes as the ball can go anywhere.
	Eg: "A good reverse pass by Tonu'u there... pity it didn't land 
	near any of his backline."

ROBUST RUNNING
	Another league term, the meaning of which I am not quite sure 
	of.  But I do know that most teams require more robust runners.
	Eg: "The Broncos need to have more robust running on attack."

ROLLING MAUL
        A maul that actually moves is deemed to be a rolling maul. It is a 
        good method of making hard yards and putting the crowd to sleep.
        Eg: "Waikato have made 5m since this maul started a minute ago. It's
        pretty exciting stuff isn't it."
        ( see hard yards/metres, maul )
	
RUCK
        When a heap of players lie sprawled on the ground and the ball is 
        wrapped up in the middle of it, it is said that a ruck has formed.
        The ball must be made available by rucking. This is a good 
	opportunity to dish out some treatment to the opposition players.
        Eg: "Oh dear, he is on the wrong side of an AB ruck......
        that will require at least 30 stitches."
        ( see rucking, treatment)

RUCKING
        Rucking involves using the boot in order to free up the ball from a
        ruck. However this use of the boot can get over vigourous and turn 
        into stomping.
        Eg: "It wasn't his fault he was pinged for over vigourous rucking
        he thought Buck Anderson's head was the ball."
        ( see stomping, ruck, pinging )

RUGBY WAS THE WINNER
	A comment made during many after match speeches. Translation: "We
	lost a close game that could have gone either way, but I think
	we should have wasted them, however in reality the ref was a wanker
	and we lost."
	Eg: "At the end of the day rugby was the winner and not us."

RUN IT AT 'EM
        A team who is desperate to score big points will run it at 'em at 
	all cost by always electing NOT to kick the ball. This is a symptom 
	of Catch Up Footie and attacking rugby. 
        Eg: "Hawkes Bay will run it at 'em all day cos they never give up."
        ( see attacking rugby, catch up footie, taking the tap )

RUNNING ON EMPTY
	When a side has run out of petrol, it is running on empty. Teams find
	it tough going, when they are running on empty. 
	Eg: The Otago forwards quite often run on empty in the last quarter
	of their matches.
	( see petrol )

RUNNING RUGBY
	A tradition espoused by the Randwick Rugby Club.  Although not 
	invented by them they have epitomised this style of the game since 
	the time of the great Cyril Towers.  Many a Randwick prop has been 
	seen scoring a running try wide out after being made look good by 
	the likes of John Thornett, Ken Catchpole, Ken Wright, the Ella 
	brothers and yes even Geoffery Sayle.  The spirit lives!
	Eg: "In recent years England has become infamous for not ever
	playing running rugby."

SCRUM
	(i) The Rugby Union version: 8 players in a 3-4-1 combination. 
	Occurs after accidental off-sides, coughs, stuffed-up droppies, 
	after a ruck has been formed and the ball not released, or when a 
	maul remains static and the ref blows it up. The scrum is fed by 
	inserting the ball parallel to the two front rows so that the hooker 
	of the feeding side can hook it back to his number 8's feet. Both 
	sides push like shit against one another, either in an attempt to 
	make ground, to push the other side off the ball or at least 
	break the opposing hooker/prop's neck/spine.
	Eg: "The scrum is packing down in centrefield. They can go left or
	right from here."
	(ii) The Rugby League version: Mildly resembles RU version, but 
	missing both flankers ie a 3-2-1 formation. Almost never any pushing;
	no point, as feeding to the scrum is always between the second-
	rower's feet and pops out almost immediately. A prerequisite for 
	these scrums is to have the hooker almost sitting on the ground. 
	Caused by coughs or kicks finding touch from broken play. Really, a 
	complete waste of time.
 	Eg: "Langer hasn't fed that ball straight into the scrum all game"
	( see left or right, cough )

SEND OFF
	(i) League Version: A player is removed from the rest of the game 
	when referee Greg McCallum gets it wrong or if the player has done 
	a single act of naughtiness; such as a tackle that creeps 2mm above 
	the shoulders. This is very disastrous for the rest of the team as 
	they have one less man for the rest of the game.
	Eg: "Now, McCallum has got it wrong *again* there was no way that the
	tackle was above the shoulders and he shouldn't have been sent off."
	(ii) Rugby Union Version: Only happens when a player has deliberately
	infringed for about the tenth time in a game or if the player has
	blatantly dished out unnecssarily harsh treatment while the ref was 
	watching. In non-international fixtures this is by far the best way 
	of getting a new player onto the field and therefore it actually 
	benefits the offending player's team.
	Eg: "Robin Brooke looks tired; I think he should smack Jones in the
	face so he can get sent off and a fresh reserve can come on."
	( see high shot, treatment )

SIXES AND SEVENS
	Occurs as a result of being split wide open; result is that the
	defensive patterns are not set and thus the attacking side has a 
	great chance to score tries.
	Eg: "Canterbury have split the Manly defence wide open, and the
	Eagles are all at sixes and sevens. What d'ya think about that,
	Lowie? Ha-Ha".

SKIP PASS
        ( see miss out pass )

SLAUGHTER
	What happens when a good team encounters a useless team and
	makes them wish that they had stayed at home.
	Eg: What the All Blacks did to Japan in the 1995 World Cup 
	pool matches: 84-3 at half time, final score: 145-17.

SLIDING DEFENCE
	A defensive pattern used by a team which involves the defence running
	across field to make the tackles. The backs start close in to the 
	scrum and move out towards the attackers.
	Eg: "The sliding defence of the Taranaki backs managed to snuff out
	that move."

SOUTHERN HEMISPHERE REFEREEING
	Refereeing that is totally incomprehensible to Northern Hemisphere 
	players. Usually interpreted as meaning that treatment must be handed
	out when ever possible.
	Eg: "A good display of southern hemisphere refereeing by Dave
	'That wasn't a forward pass' Bishop. If he had blown that one up,
	there wouldn't have been nearly so many casualties."
	( see northern hemisphere refereeing, treatment )

SPEAR TACKLE
	A tackle that is designed to permanently injure the poor bastard
	with the ball.  The tackler(s) upend the ball carrier by grabbing
	him by the balls and then drive his head as hard as they can
	into the ground.  A good way to earn a rest for the whole team as 
	the resulting stretcher and neck brace always take at least 5 
	minutes to come out.
	Eg: "That Harrogan is a dirty player as he dead set spear tackled
	little Alfie while the ref wasn't watching."

SPEARING 
    	Where a new player tackles the opposition by putting the top of his 
	head squarely into the abdomen of the runner.  Tackler usually 
	leaves his feet, and receives a serious neck injury after attempting 
	this once.  Usually a habit of American football player-rugby 
	crossovers.
	Eg: "Ohhhh, wow, Gareth Rees there spearing the opposition man
	with his head, that's gotta hurt!"

SPILL
	Differs from a cough in that the ball tends to just fall forward
	rather than actually being "coughed" forward.
	Eg: "Ohhhh.... he's spilled the ball on the line and bombed a 
	certain try. That'll cost them the series!"
	( see cough )

SPRAY
	The act of missing the posts by a great distance when shooting for
	goal. Very common occurrence when using torpedo style. Most 
	spectacular when shooting for goal from the side line, but most 
	stupid when from in front.
	Eg: He sprayed it from right in front of the posts.
	Note: the most impressive spray (using a non-torpedo technique)
	seen to date would have to be that of the Argentinian fly half 
	Cilley against Manu Samoa: Started from the left hand touch, the 
	kick curved in the air to reach to right hand touch line without
	ever looking like crossing the goal line, let alone go through
	the posts.
	( see torpedo )

STEAL METRES
	(i) The act gaining ground while the opposition is not ready. Very 
	similar to cheap yards as not a hand is laid on the ball carrier.
	This is quite often achieved when a game is being played at pace.
	Eg: "Steve Walters has is very good at stealing yards from the dummy
	half position."
	(ii) A form of cheating where a player always takes at least 2 steps
	forward from where a penalty, mark or the play the ball should be
	taken.
	Eg: "Hancock has been stealing metres all game by not playing the
	ball from where he was tackled."
	( see cheap yards, cheating, playing it at pace )

STEAL THE BALL
	( see strip )

STOMPING
        When rucking gets dangerous, ie if a boot is being raked across the 
        head of another player, it is called stomping. This is way of hurting
        opposition players and conceding penalties. A player who does this is
        called filthy.
        Eg: "Richard Loe has really hurt Timu this time by stomping 
	repeatedly on his head. Well it's his own fault for being on the 
	wrong side of the ruck."
        ( see rucking, conceding the penalty, filthy, treatment)

STRIP
	(i) A term used in league to describe the illegal process of 
	ripping the ball away from the person who is playing the ball. 
	Usually carried out in front of the referee so that the offending 
	player is pinged. This a very good way of conceding an unnecessary 
	penalty.
	Eg: "That was dumb play from Lomax to strip the ball in the tackle
	as Harrigan has dished out another penalty."
	(ii) Is also used to refer to the players' kit.
	Eg: "The All Black's strip is easily recognised."
	( see conceding the penalty, pinging, change strip )
	NOTE : The obvious alternative meaning has been omitted due to the 
	fact it has (should have) no bearing on the game of rugby.

TAKE OUT
        When a player is effected is such a way that he can not participate
	in the current passage of play he is said to be taken out. This can
        be accomplished in a variety of ways:
            1) The pokai method.
            2) Putting them on the deck.
            3) Giving them an illegal high shot.
	    4) Holding a player down in the lineout.
            5) Holding a faster player back in a race to the loose ball.
            6) Over vigourous use of the boot and not just at ruck time.
        Eg: "Fox was taken out rather badly with that late high shot."
        ( see pokai, deck, high shot, stomping )

TAKING THE TAP
	Instead of shooting for goal, a team may elect to take the tap after
	being awarded a penalty. This is done as soon as the penalty is 
	awarded so as to try and catch the opposition within the 10 metre 
	area and gain another penalty for offside play. Can be quite effective 
	against teams with big slow forwards. Teams that play the game at pace 
	usually use this tactic, even at the expense of relatively easy 
	penalty shots. Teams playing catch up footie always use this tactic.
	Eg: Hawkes Bay took the tap quickly many times late in the second 
	half, to beat the French touring side 30-25.
	( see playing at pace, catch up footie )

TALENTED
	A player who can bust a tackle or never coughs the ball is said to 
	be talented, according to Stu Wilson.
	Eg: "That (insert name of player with the ball) is really talented."
	( see cough, bust )

TEN IN THE BIN
        When a referee loses his cool he will order a player from the field
        for a period of ten minutes in order to stamp his mark on the game,
        this is known as ten in the bin. In league referees think that they 
	are in control of a game when they do this, so it happens quite 
	often and can totally unbalance a game. While in rugby this is a 
	very good method of getting a 10 minute breather while a fresh man
	takes your place.
        Eg: "Harrigan is a good law and order man; he has kept control of 
        the situation by giving him ten in the bin."

TEN MAN RUGBY
	A brand of rugby where the only players involved on attack are the 8 
	forwards, the halfback and the 1st five. It is characterised by 
	plenty of hard yards, rolling mauls, bombs and kicks to touch. Often 
	played by teams who have no confidence in their backline.
	Eg: Waikato are (should be, once were) masterful exponents of ten
	man rugby.

TEN METRES
	Used to be five metres. The distance which the defending team 
	must stand back from the play the ball. A good ref will keep a
	"big ten metres" while a poor ref will keep a "small ten metres";
	whatever that means. Thus it is very rare for the gap to be 
	anywhere near 10m. 
	Eg: "That man Harrigan has been keeping a big ten metres all night 
	and that has allowed an open fast game to take place." 
	( see play the ball, offside )

TIGHTHEAD
	(i) A New Zealand term for obtaining possession from a scrum
        on the opposition put-in. Usually caused by the opposing
        hooker dropping off to sleep in a particularly boring match,
        or being distracted by little things such as both opposing
        props kicking the shit out of him.
	Eg: "Fitzie should've payed attention there. The Waikato machine has
	just won the tighthead by demolishing the Auckland scrum."
        (ii) The effect felt when playing rugby the day after drinking
        15 pints of Speights Old Dark followed by half a bottle of
        180-proof rum.
	Eg: "He looks to have a bit of a tighthead there - it's his own fault
	for hitting the piss last night."

TORPEDO
	A highly effective style of kicking typified by the Mighty Mal 
	Meninga. How to kick torpedo style:
		1) Place ball on tee/sand in line with the posts.
		2) Take 3 or 4 steps back.
		3) Take at least 2 deep breaths while thinking "Black Dot" 
		4) Charge in towards the ball and then stick your boot in to 
		   it and at the same time raise your arms parallel to the 
		   ground. Make NO compensation for the wind. 
		5) Hopefully the thing will have gone over or it will have 
		   been one god almighty spray.
	This style is restricted to league players only.
	Eg: 10 years ago torpedo style was the best way to kick. (Yeah Right)
	( see black dot, spray, meninga )

TREATMENT
        A player receives treatment when they are given a physical beating of
        some sort. Some of the treatments that can be prescribed are:
            1) Facial massage with the ground.
            2) Stiff arm to the upper body region.
            3) Upper cut to the jaw.
            4) Pokai  ( a good poke in the eye will stop anyone ).
            5) Knee raised into the groin area.
            6) Kick to the groin area.
            7) Bite to the ear  ( the Le Roux special ).
            8) An elbow while their back is turned  ( The Rush technique ).
            9) Stomp their heads pretending that it was the ball.
           10) A descent crash tackle ( being careful not to mimic sack of 
                spuds man Rhys Ellison; 3 months in the spinal unit after
                trying it against Frank Bounce ). 
           11) Raking every part of their body with the boot for refusing to 
                roll away from the ball.
           12) Any other method which inflicts pain and you can almost get
                away with.
	Players on the receiving end of treatment usually have to resort
	to the wearing of head gear for long periods, if not for the rest
	of their playing days. Remember different circumstances require 
	different treatments and some may cause permanent damage if mixed 
	together so be careful!!! These should only be carried out by trained 
	professional thugs.
        Eg: Richard "pokai, stomp em, kick em , punch em, hurt em, make em
        suffer, make em scream " Loe regularly prescribes and administers all 
        forms of treatment.

TURNOVER
	When a team concedes possession of the ball they have turned the 
	ball over. Sometimes used to describe the actions of the opposite 
	team, ie forcing a turnover.
	Eg: When a ruck has formed and the ball is unable to be released, 
	the ball is turned over to the other side and a scrum is set.
	
TWINKLE TOES
	A player who thinks they can spot a gap where none exists is said 
	to have twinkle toes. This condition is characterised by constant 
	cutting back and is a symptom of Little's Disease.
	Eg: Ellison, Little and Stensness all have twinkle toes.
	( see little's disease, cut back )

TWO PASS SPREAD
	A league term meaning that the ball is passed twice and then the
	receiver sticks his head down and charges toward the line.  As
	opposed to the one pass hit up.
	Eg: "The Kiwi's are really trying their hand with that two pass 
	spread."
	( see hit it up )

UNDER THE STICKS
	(i) Where a try has been scored between the two upright posts
	Eg: "He's dotted it down under the sticks"
	(ii) When a conversion/penalty attempt doesn't go the distance, 
	falling just short of the cross-bar.
	Eg: "Bad luck, the kick has gone under the sticks."

UP AND UNDER
	Scottish version of the Bomb. 
	Eg: "Chalmers has put up a huge up and under there... wait, whats
	that on the ball?"
	( see coming down with snow on it, bomb )

VARIATION
	For most teams this involves using different tactics instead
	of resorting to their usual game plan.
	Eg: England's definition of a variation: Rob Andrew kicking
	with his left foot.

VRYSTAAAAAAT 
	Pronounced Fraystaaaaaahhhhht, this endearment is most often 
	uttered at high volume at rugby matches by spectators. Usually, 
	but not always, when Orange Free State is on the field. It is a 
	most useful word which can mean anything, but is usually an 
	exhortation to perform better. It can however also be heard when 
	the utterer is merely feeling good. Also if he wants to rattle the
	cages of Transvaal, Western Province and Natal fans. It is also 
	heard in pubs, busses, cars and at any gathering where South 
	Africans have got together to watch or participate in sport, burn 
	meat, drink piss and so on. It is often heard overseas, usually 
	when the Springboks are playing, but not always. I have personally
	heard it yelled at Eden Park, Athletic Park, Twickenham and 
	Cardiff Arms Park and on one or two of those occasions there 
	wasn't even a South African on the field. Only one or two feeling
	happy in the stands. Listen out for it during the Super 10 this 
	year.
	Eg: "VRYSTAAAAAAT!!!  VRYSTAAAAAAT!!!  VRYSTAAAAAAT!!!"

WHEELS
	(i) A term that describes a player who is very fast.
	Eg: "This player has really got wheels."
	(ii) A term that describes the instance where a player is faster 
	than the person marking him.
	Eg: Eric Rush has really got the wheels on Eroni Clarke.

WILSON
	Similar to Meninga in that it refers to failing under pressure; named
	after the "great" Otago player J. Wilson for his efforts in the 1993 
	England/AB test and (especially) for the goal-line cough(qv) in the
	1994 Bledisloe Cup match.
	Eg: "He's done a Wilson!!!"
	( see cough )

WINDS UP 
	Used in League when a forward gets the ball from a kick-off or 
	early in a set of 6 tackles.
        Eg: "... and Big Martin Bella winds up..." (followed by Bella 
	playing-the-ball facing the wrong goal then getting into a fight.)

WORLD CLASS
	Desribes a player who stands out from the rest of his team mates
	in a weaker playing nation, but sadly in reality wouldn't have
	a shit show in making it into a stronger country's team.
	Eg: "That Sanoko for the Ivory Coast, he's World Class!"

WRAP IT UP
        (i) When the game is all but won, and the final whistle only needs 
        to sound for a team to win the game (ie they have a huge lead), they
        will usually wrap the game up by slowing everything down, usually 
        through continuous rolling mauls and constantly kicking for touch. 
        This can be very irritating to watch, especially for fans of the 
        losing team.
	Eg: "Waikato have got the game here - all they need to do is wrap it
	up" ( Wellington v Waikato, 1994 HT: 16-6 FT: 30-23 to Wellington ).
        (ii) When a team takes an unbeatable lead by scoring a try they are
        said to have wrapped the game up. This only occurs in the final 
        quarter as anything can happen in rugby.
        Eg: "The try under the sticks should wrap it up for Auckland as with
        only two minutes left on the clock they lead North Harbour 31 - 28"
        ( 1994: North Harbour went on to win 35 - 31 ). 
        ( see rolling maul )

WRONG FOOTED
	When a player makes a stupis ass out of himself by attempting a 
	tackle when he is moving in the wrong direction he is said to 
	be wrong footed.
	Eg: "Wilson was brilliantly wrong footed by Campese who simply
	went round him to score out wide."

X-RATED
	A phrase used to describe a particularly nasty bit of foul
        play perpetrated by a player and caught by the cameras.
        Such excerpts can be gathered together and made into a
        'video nasty'. Chief amongst these 'X-RATED' clips is the
        one of Richard Loe gently exploring Greg Coopers eye-socket,
        however the footage of this action is said to be badly
        degraded, having been replayed about 16,300 times.
	Eg: "There's a bit of X-rated play going on in that maul, eh Stuey."

YAKKA
	Always used in conjunction with the word "hard". Refers to the
        excessive amount of work being put in (usually for no gain)
        by the forwards.
	Eg: The Great Keith Quinn commentating on an All Black vs France 
	test in Paris: "It's hard yakka in there!" referring to a mass of
        steaming, straining bodies locked in a maul.
	( see hard yards/metres )

ZAMBUKS
	Another term for first aiders. I have only ever heard it used in NZ. 
	Eg: "The Zambuks have been attending him for the last 3 minutes, 
	it looks like that he will be a stretcher case."

ZINZAN 
	A "zinzan" is a drop-goal attempt from 40-50 metres by a forward
        which only gets about 2-3m off the deck. Named after the
        couple of efforts Zinzan Brooke tried in the 1994 All Black
        vs South Africa tests.
	Eg: "Eales! has tried another zinzan from half way again - the guy
	is a bloody hero!!! "


----- END LIST -----

Copyright by David Warner, 1995
May be freely distributed, provided that the document is left in its
original form.

Don't rip me off!!!




-- 
************************************************************************
* David Warner     Email : djw1@cs.waikato.ac.nz                       *
* Creator and maintainer of the Rugby Phrase Guide.                    *
* CompSci and Maths Dept, University of Waikato, Hamilton, NZ.         *
* "Don't try to be like Jackie.  There is only one Jackie...           *
*       Study computers instead."         - Jackie Chan                *
************************************************************************